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Hey everyone! Today is Sunday, week 7.
Let’s start of with: Happy birthday to me! 🥳 Today, I get to say I am 26 years old. For anybody who wishes to know: No, I do not really celebrate my birthday. Haven’t done this for a few years now. There is still pie and some gifts on this day, but no family visits or extravagant celebrations. I find the calmness much more celebratory. This gives opportunity to reflect on the previous year and set goals for the new one. 

So, let’s move on to what has been happening the past 3 days!
The last blog ended on a rather low note. Even thought lows are essential for growth, it is not something enjoyable. The experience in the garden center hit me hard, as I realized how long of a way I still have to go before I will consider myself mentally and physically healthy again. I am ready to embrace that, but I am not the type to just sit around and wait.

So I didn’t!
On Friday, I decided to do some work in the morning (Korean language course) and ended up going out for lunch at my local teahouse. I decided the exposure therapy was the way to go. I went alone so I could truly focus on what I was thinking and feeling, and brought my laptop as a commitment to at least staying there for a while and do some work. I agreed with myself that even if I got sick, I would stay there until I would feel better. That way, I force myself to not accept the flight response, and instead work through it until it no longer has a hold on me. 

I ended up going there with the mindset “I was able to eat yesterday. I did not feel good, but I was able to eat. So I can do it again.”. 
And I could! It was a very concentrated lunch, with lots of short breaks, but I did not get sick, and did not have to decompress in the bathroom or anything that I associate with the flight response. I actually had a good experience while eating out again. 

And beyond that, it was one of the most productive days I’ve had in a while. Practicing a language in the morning, getting a short workout in, a bike ride to the teahouse, eating out for lunch, getting work done in the afternoon, and still having energy to play some online games with friends in the evening. 
It was quite astounding to me, and I enjoyed every second of it. 

On Saturday, I took it much easier. I did some reading, and afterwards spent most of the day on improving my company website. 
It might not be obvious now, as I still work on it on the background, but Hilhorst Management officially has the full system running to open its own shop! And I could not be more excited. I hope more information will follow soon.

I have decided for my self-study to move towards audio books for book-reading. I notice in daily life that I do not want to spend the many hours reading a book. Because my study abroad is in little over 3 months, I find myself scrambling to save money to be able to enjoy my time in Korea. The amount of time I need to read books (and finish them) is time that I simply cannot miss in current circumstances.

So I have decided to combine powers! While working on easier work-related tasks, I will listen to audio books on stress and personality types. 
 For the upcoming days, I have:
Tyler Bordan – Introvert
Thomas Erikson – Surrounded by Idiots
Lois P. Frankel – Nice girls don’t get the corner office
Marsha Boone Kelley & Frederica J. Balzano Phd – Why Should Extroverts Make All the Money?

I think that will keep me busy for a while!

5 Comments

  • Yimeng Yang says:

    Frankly, I like the image that you chose for this blog, it looks very cheerful. But the most important thing is HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO U!!! You are always being a wonderful team leader, and willing to help us out when we are down, I really appreciate that, and I have got the same feeling that when you turn to 20 or older, we tend to don’t celebrate our birthdays, because once we do, it means we are getting older and youth is fading away. Sorry to say that but I guess everyone needs to experience that. However, in my opinion, the most important thing is actually where did you spend your youth? Did you find anything that you want to fight for? Did you find someone that you truly love? Or did you find a goal in your lifetime? I think that’s; beyond the ages, we could be young forever, because they are just numbers, as long as we have a lifeful heart then we are young forever.

  • Happy Birthday Ilse! Another year passed by of you being great, hard-working and passionate about whatever you lie your eyes on .As a person who always feels the pressure to do something on my birthday .I fully agree with you that a better way to celebrate is in calmness and just appreciation that you are alive and healthy. Also being with your loved ones. A constructive reflection on the past year and setting the new goals for the year is definitely better than getting drink or partying.
    I like your exposure therapy .I think it will really help in the direction that you want to go. Especially if the weather is good the vitamin D in the country is a rare occasion. Your day sounds really proactive and nice maybe you can make this a regular occasion or just a short bike ride if the weather is nice it will always boost your mood. Or maybe you can even listen to an audio book in the park .

  • Happy Birthday, Ilse! Another year passed by of you being great, hard-working and passionate about whatever you lay your eyes on. As a person who always feels the pressure to do something on my birthday. I fully agree with you that a better way to celebrate is in calmness and just appreciate that you are alive and healthy. Also being with your loved ones. A constructive reflection on the past year and setting the new goals for the year is better than getting a drink or partying.
    I like your exposure therapy. I think it will help in the direction that you want to go. Especially if the weather is good vitamin D in the country is a rare occasion. Your day sounds proactive and nice maybe you can make this a regular occasion or just a short bike ride if the weather is nice it will always boost your mood. Or maybe you can even listen to an audiobook in the park.

  • Sebastiaan says:

    Happy Bloody Birthday, I Already congratulated you in the middle of the night but here I am once again. Enjoy the outside world often (Okay i get how this might sound) it would do you good. Work can wait sometimes

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